Ducky Lee (thisisnotmylj) wrote,
Ducky Lee
thisisnotmylj

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Crazy mommy

I saw this advertisement on television, about a year ago, for "your baby can read" and it sounded amazing. They list the price as $14.95 for a "trial" of 30 days. I had looked over the site and didn't find any problem with it so I decided I'd order it when Elliot was a bit older. Well, I saw the advertisement again today and I thought it sounded to good to be true. I went to the website to read more about it and with every intention of ordering. I thought that whatever the cost, this product sounded awesome. I read the entire website and there was no indication of the real price anywhere. Until I went to hit the button to order and that's when they hit me with a $200 price tag. I couldn't believe it! But it makes sense why they didn't want the price out in the open. That is so ridiculous. I was so excited about buying this thing for Elliot and now I'm so fucking disappointed, I wish there was something I could do about it. I know it's stupid to get so worked up over something so silly. I know there is nothing I can do and I know that most things advertised on television are actually scams. But when it comes to my baby, something clicks in my head. It just makes me so angry that something I have wanted for so long turns out to be a complete scam. If it was a legitimate company, they would have no reason to be so sneaky and hide the real price. Just 3 "easy" payments of $66.65. That might be "easy" for some people but it's not for me. I can't afford to spend that kind of money on something like that. But even if I did have that money, I wouldn't buy from a company that was so sneaky and dishonest. I wish I was someone of influence so I could tell everyone I know, "Do NOT order from yourbabycanread.com" and make them lose business. But I'm just a sad, pathetic mother of one whose opinion really isn't worth the time it takes to read it. Oh well. I"ll get over it. I'll find my daughter some other "learn to read" product.

In other news, I can't find the USB cord that goes with my Sony Handycam and I've got nearly 2000 pictures of Elliot from the last 2 months that I'm dying to share. Not to mention an hours worth of cute video clips. I wanted to share her birthday pictures and videos of her eating her first birthday cakes (yeah she had two birthday parties so two cakes... well, actually there were three cakes because at the second party, there were two but only one was for her so yeah, two. I'll explain more later). Right now, I have 50 dollars to spend on Amazon.com and i'm torn between buying stuff for Elliot and getting at least one thing for myself. I picked out a book I want for like 7 bucks which should be alright because it still leaves Elliot with 43 dollars but of course, I'll find something I like for her that costs like 45 or something and then I'll have to give up my book. I always do that, I never get anything for myself. Even on my birthday, my brother told me to pick out stuff on Amazon and he'd pay and I had picked out a bunch of stuff I wanted and then I started looking at baby stuff and one by one, I replaced all my stuff with Elliot stuff (oh I'll put this book back in exchange for this toy... oh i'll put this thing back in exchange for this thing). I ended up getting not a thing for me. I don't even remember the last time I bought something for myself. But to be honest, it makes me happy to see her playing with a new toy or just looking beautiful in a new outfit so it's totally worth it.

In semi-related news, I think I'm losing my mind. Being a single mother is hard. I feel for all you single mothers, I really do. But I'm not sure what's worse. Not having a husband/father. Or having one who lays there all day long doing nothing. Jaje hurt his back so he's been out of work for awhile now and he doesn't do anything but eat, sleep, and watch tv (and he does all this from the comfort of his side of the bed). Meanwhile, I get no sleep, no breaks, and don't even have time to do my homework. I've even considered maybe I should just give up on school for now. But I don't think I would ever forgive myself or him if I did that. I don't know. I'm losing my mind. Case in point: this morning I didn't get to sleep till 7am, woke up at 10am, spilled milk all over the floor while pouring some for Elliot then knocked over the milk while cleaning up previously spilled milk and spilled even more milk. From there, it's just a blur of bumping, spilling, dropping, hurting, screaming, crying, and I don't know how this happened but my pants are on inside out. And it's only 3pm. Who knows what else is in store for me on this miserable inside out and backwards day of disasters. I don't know how much more of this I can take. I'm quite honestly and very seriously considering the possibility that I'm cracking up.

p.s. my paid account expired. who wants to be my best friend in the whole world and renew my paid account for me? :o)
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  • 11 comments
Welcome to mommyhood! I think I felt overwhelmed for only, oh, the first 15 years or so, lol. It does get easier though, so hang in there.

I've seen those Your Baby Can Read infomercials on TV for the last few years. I wonder if they really work like they say they do. You might want to Google 'reviews of your baby can read program' and see what you come up with. I really don't see a need for it though. Just read to her every day and teach her her ABC's and she'll learn fast. I had all my kids reading simple stuff around 4 years old and really, what's the need for a kid to know how to read before that?

My paid account expired in June and I really think I'm just going to stick with my basic account for now.
Is it sad that I think of myself as "mama" even to myself, like in my own head. Like saying "mama has to go to sleep" to myself. hehe. I catch myself doing that and I'm like "Omg" like i'm not myself anymore. It's like you have this image of yourself in your head and this attitude towards yourself and then somehow it totally changes. I don't know if that even makes sense. But it scares me sometimes when I look back at my past life and I'm like "wow, where did that girl go?" How did I turn into this? I don't know what I'm even doing most of the time. Every night when Elliot finally goes to bed for the night, it's like oh what a relief... finally time to myself! But then it's like well, what do i do now? Even though I do have a ton of stuff i should do (clean, do dishes, fold laundry, do homework), I just don't have the energy left to do any of it. Being a mommy is so exhausting. hehe.

Deleted comment

You're totally right. I think the best way to teach your baby to read should be by reading to them, no? Besides, if I want my daughter to watch tv, I have plenty of quality shows available anytime I want for free. Elliot and I watch sesame street every morning and if we miss it or want to watch it later, we can record it or watch it on demand whenever we feel like it. I love to watch her dance to the music. And hopefully, she's learning from it too. I guess there is nothing those dvds and flash cards can do that I can not do myself. :o)
Nintendo DS, and 3 games

My Virtual Reading Tutor: Pre-k to Kindergarden
My Virtual Reading Tutor: Kindergarden to 1st Grade
and
My Virtual Reading Tutor:1st Grade to 2nd Grade

Using my DS with the 4 year old gets her excited to learn. The 2 year old likes the colors and shapes in some younger games I have.


If only i had a DS! or could afford one! hehe. I think maybe I'll wait till she's a bit older and hopefully i'll have a dime to my name by then which is like 100% of what I have now (actually, that's not right because i have nothing). sorry about that. i am in fact feeling sorry for myself now because i can't afford to buy anything at all. i hate being so broke. it's so unfair. i'll stop now. thanks for the recommendation though. that sounds wonderful.
lol no your in the same boat as many people. got a DS a while ago, and through the use of a flash card have since downloaded about 300 games. I cant afford to by anything either.
hey why buy when you can download? :o)
hey sweetie

awe i feel for you *hugs* just because jaje can't work doesn't mean he can't help you with elliot, thats ridiculous! its so sad that you consider yourself a "single mom" yet you have a husband and father to the child there! I just don't get it... is he getting unemployment at least? what about school for him? when do you think he'll be back up and working again? he needs to do SOMETHING- my God... I wish there was more i could do. I've seen that "your baby can read" a lot, its usually on early in the morning- the paid programming... i didn't know it was that expensive! i was actually thinking when i have a baby i would want that.
I feel you on feeling alone when you have a husband... i couldn't imagine having a baby with bear right now, he's fucking useless and i feel lonelier with him than i ever did without. i don't know what i thought i was missing, sad huh? now i'm thinking divorce, but i don't want to be alone and ugh!!! its too much to think about...
i hope you feel better soon, i sent you some *real* mail... maybe it'll cheer you up.

xoxo
Crystak
Thanks Crystal

I actually found a different baby reading program for much much cheaper at www.abcflip.com that i'm considering. Of course, we've got no money right now. Jaje is not getting anything at all from anywhere so we are so just stuck. we have absolutely nothing and my mother is being a complete bitch. she refuses to help us at all. All she does is complain and yell at me for all the things she thinks I do wrong. I don't know what to do about it. Jaje is going to the doctor on tuesday to find out what is going on with his back. Part of me is hoping that they will say his back is fucked up and put him on tons of painkillers because then I'd take them all. I'm just so tired of never having anything and of always having to devote myself 100% with no return. It's like, what am i even doing? I mean, maybe just having elliot around and seeing her happy should be enough for me but it's not. i'm sorry that it's not. i love her so much but it just can't be my whole life. i have to be something more than a mother. i don't know what i want. i'm so confused and tired and just crazy. i think i need to go to therapy. heh. love you. when are you coming to visit me? I've got furniture now and everything is all good. You have to come! *kisses*
well, there has to be a balance of mommy time and not mommy time. if that balance isnt being met, you will go insane. As the primary watcher of my kids I completely understand where your coming from. Its funny, my wife gets home around 4ish, and within 2 hours she is ready to rip her hair outta her head, all I do is sit back and chuckle at how easily she loses her patience.

I hope his back is better and he is able to do something. At the same time, maybe you leaving him with the kiddo while you go and do something will help your mindset, as well as his seeming inability to bond with his kid.

good luck. ya know were here to chat.
well i gave him a day with the baby on sunday because I really had to do some school work. to his credit, she does have a lot of fun with him. when he actually does spend time with her, he does good. he'll get on the floor with her and play and sing. She loves that. the only thing that bothers me is that he loads her up on junk food and doesn't feed her anything healthy. i guess that's no big deal for one day though. but i'd like them to spend more time together. it'd be nice to spend time together as a family or even him and I as a couple but that's not happening. it really shouldn't be so difficult but i don't know how to fix it.